Chile Update #3
When I first arrived here in Chile, loneliness was one of my main fears.
I did not know how I was going to handle it or what being alone would lead too. I even mentioned it in my first update. The feeling of being surrounded by people but not able to be understood.
A good friend of mine back home gave me some life changing advice. He said don’t miss out on what God has for you during this alone time. When I reached out to him, It was around my tenth day here and I could see temptations to fill the alone time with media and reading. Loneliness seemed wrong to me. Like a person should not be left with their own thoughts for so many hours and days in a row. Something inside of me knew my friend was right. I again had a choice to push into or avoid what God might be doing. I have always believe if you seek God he will make things clear. I was not willing to miss out on anything God was trying to show me.
In scripture the first thing God names as not good is loneliness.
We really only know ourselves in relationship to God and others. We are lonely, then, because we are separated. All men are broken and separated after the fall. In order to gain wholeness and maturity as a person. We must acknowledge and deeply repent of the separation in our lives. We receive this fullness as we seek to dwell in his presence. Personhood, identity, being itself come from God. If we learn to keep our eyes up, fully focused on God, we are brought into a place of becoming. As our hands and hearts are open to receive. Wholeness is all about coming into that presence. God the father, who has the power of being, heals and affirms us, creating in us a new solid sense of being. For me a firm foundation. When God is centered in us and us in him, we have a home within, a true identity out of which to live.
I share all of this because once I started practicing being in his presence. A place of listening-obedience and my eyes were on him I never felt lonely again. When I think about my time here it is the opposite of loneliness. I have been enjoying Gods peace and unconditional love. Learning, serving, changing and growing all with God above me and within me. This time here has been the most intimate time I have ever had with the lord and I am so glad I did not miss it by filling my time with distractions. The new issue now will be not wanting to leave this country. A place where I have learned to walk hand in hand with God. This land that God made a home in my heart so that loneliness is no longer an issue.
Christians who come into spiritual and psychological wholeness are thereby free to go out and take the world for Christ.
For me this time has been mostly about coming into spiritual wholeness. I have been seeking God for about 10 years now, trying to do what was right and learning about what the truth really was. Looking back I can see Gods faithfulness to bring psychological wholeness. I had 20 years of Sin and wrong beliefs to sort thru and face. There was grieving that needed to happen, understanding that needed to sink in, repentance, forgiveness more repentance and more forgiveness. When I was saved at 16 God had to start at the beginning. Redeeming my Birth experience, revealing my sexual abuse and the repercussions of that, re-parenting me in healthy bounders, healthy sexuality, healthy communication, value and identity.
Jesus is a survivor of abuse
There is real power in understanding or being understood. When I look back on my own abuses and how God has walked me through years of processes to restore what was lost in me. I have so much hope for others. It’s like a driving force that pushes me to want to help people. What impacted me was that Jesus must also be driven by that same truth and hope. He understands because he was there too.
- Family background – abandoned by his father at the most critical time of the abuse;
- His mother was an adolescent when she got pregnant and was not married. His father almost rejected his mother because of the baby;
- His mother was present during the abuse, but was prevented from helping him. Imagine the pain….
- He was an innocent person who behaved well and had many friends. His friends did not understand why these bad things happened to him;
- He was a child that knew and loved God. He prayed and read his scriptures.
- He had many different abusers, among them was a well-know religious minister in his community.
- The type of abuse was physical, mocking, emotional, spiritual and sexual.
- He was abandoned and betrayed by people he knew and he had trusted.
- While he was abused, the abusers said things like, “Why don’t you ask God to stop this?”
- His abusers drew blood when they abused him.
- After a time of abuse he dies and they left him naked in public.
- Do you think this person could understand your experience of abuse if he had survived??
Jesus did survive. He rose from the dead restored. He brought life from death. It was a miracle.
A victim is someone who is dead. Jesus is a survivor of abuse, He is alive. The main difference is a victim has no choice. There was an injustice and something bad happened. He died so that we could have free will, so we could have choice. When he rose again he was now a survivor of abuse. Jesus died and in a miracle rose again so that we to could do the same. Our miracle today is when people are able to talk about abuse. the miracle of healing comes. You are no longer a victim but a survivor.
Now that the miracle has happened the real work begins. Abuse damages our bodys, emotions, thoughts and spirit. The real work is walking out the process of learning how to live again and see how God wants to restore each area.
When Lazarus died, Jesus had compassion and preformed a miracle. He brought life from Death. As a counselor I can not bring life from Death – only Jesus can. After Jesus had raised Lazarus from the dead, he said to his disciples, “Remove the death robes from him”. Once a person comes to life there is a process of removing the death robes. As counselor I can come alongside someone in their process of removing the death robes/old self. Jesus did not do this part in a miraculous way. He simple asked his disciple to help do it.
I personally see it as a true honor when someone lets me come alongside them in a part of their process. Opening their hearts and sharing their story. We are all in the process of being redeemed.